july 30

yes, i realize it's actually october, but in 'my utmost for his highest', i'm only on july 30th -- just a wee bit behind :-) pretend it's still summer for a moment.
for some reason this one really jumped out at me this morning. probably because it speaks to something god's been consistent to bring up again and again in my life -- the importance of trusting the goodness of god instead of looking for the goodness in people. if you've got a minute, read this.

'the discipline of disillusionment'
'jesus did not commit himself unto them... for he knew what was in man.' john 2:24-25

'disillusionment means that there are no more false judments in life. to be undeceived by disillusionment may leave us cynical and unkindly severe in our judgment of others, but the disillusionment which comes from god brings us to the place where we see men and women as they really are, and yet there is no cynicism, we have no stinging bitter things to say. many of the cruel things in life spring from the fact that we suffer from illusions. we are not true to one another as facts; we are true only to our ideas of one another. everything is either delightful and fine, or mean and dastardly, according to our idea.
the refusal to be disillusioned is the cause of much of the suffering in human life. it works in this way -- if we love a human being and do not love god, we demand of him every perfection and every rectitude, and when we do not get it we become cruel and vindictive; we are demanding of a human being that which he or she cannot give. there is only one being who can satisfy the last aching abyss of the human heart, and that is the lord jesus christ. why our lord is apparently so severe regarding every human relationship is because he knows that every relationship not based on loyalty to himself will end in disaster. our lord trusted no man, yet he was never suspicious, never bitter. our lord's confidence in god and in what his grace could do for any man, was so perfect that he despaired of no one. if our trust is placed in human beings, we shall end in despairing of everyone.'

i had to read that 2 or 3 times for it to sink in, but it's just so good and true. it's very easy for me to place my hopes in certain people to be the way i need them to be. then when they don't measure up, it feels hopeless that i'll ever find someone worth trusting. but it's not hopeless -- god is worth trusting, and he's working in each of the people in my life as much as in me. i can trust the spirit's life in them, and when they don't meet my expectations, i can rest in the knowledge that god hasn't failed me.
he is everything that i need and he never changes.
that's a good thing.